The Expendables 2

Credit: Lionsgate Films

2010’s Expendables was a much-anticipated movie since it mixed stars of yesterday’s action movies (Stallone, Dolph Lundgren) with current action blockbuster heroes (Li, Statham), and threw in “stars” of straight-to-video movies and professional sports (Steve Austin, Randy Couture) to round out the cast. Everything that movie lacked was made up for in the brand new Expendables 2. Sequels are always bigger, louder, and badder and this movie delivered big time. For the sake of comparing this series to a series from the past, I would say Expendables One was very much like Star Trek: The Motion Picture, which was a good piece of nostalgia. Expendables Two would be like its sequel, The Wrath of Khan; there’s a death, a hammy villain, grander action, though the only problem I had with Expendables 2 is the editing felt very choppy.

I was excited to see that Jean-Claude Van Damme was added to this movie’s cast, yet I scoffed at the inclusion of Chuck Norris. I felt the “Chuck Norris Facts” running wild on the internet were a fun joke that lasted a few years past their expiration date and he was little more than a punch-line, yet that’s exactly the way this movie used him: as a punch-line. Touché, Chuck; who I think I shall now call “Deus Ex Chuckina.” Van Damme wasn’t about to be out-done though, as I think casting him as the movie’s villain was another stroke of genius. I was just telling a friend while watching Universal Soldier that I thought casting Van Damme as a robotic soldier was a great move since it played to his strengths (or weaknesses) as an actor. Being the villain in this movie is very similar since he can be a bit cheesy and then kick ass, without having to carry an entire movie. Another noteworthy performance was Dolph Lundgren as the dim-witted “Gunner.” He was my favorite of the band of heroes, who tried to steal the show with his snoring and escape plans.

Much like action movies made today, the makers of The Expendables 2 were probably planning a third movie before this one even hit theaters. I will be there opening weekend for sure, though I hope Expendables 3 is even bigger but also moves in a different direction. I would like to see more action heroes of yesterday, like Carl Weathers, and even a man who’s become an unlikely action star, Liam Neeson. The best setting for this should be a prison. The Expendables gang gets locked up in a maximum security prison in a faraway location with some of the roughest and meanest inmates ever, which allows for so many cameos, either as inmates, guards, and a stern warden. Pro-wrestlers as mean inmates are a must! But I digress. Expendables 3 can do whatever it wants, even a prequel like Expendables 3: The ExpendaBabies, and they’d have my money!